12 Qualities of Emotionally Intelligent People

What truly sets successful individuals apart?

After decades of research into the world’s most effective leaders, one consistent factor stands out—a trait that sets top performers apart from the rest: emotional intelligence.

Emotional intelligence, or emotional quotient (EQ), is the ability to understand, regulate, and express your emotions effectively while recognizing and responding to the emotions of others. It’s the foundation of strong relationships, clear communication, and personal and professional success.

But how can you tell if someone is emotionally intelligent? The signs of high emotional intelligence show up in everyday moments—from resolving conflicts and collaborating with others to the way we handle ourselves under pressure.

In this article, we’ll uncover the most telling signs of emotional intelligence and explore how these traits can transform the way you live, connect with others, and achieve your goals.

Traits of Emotionally Intelligent People

1. Awareness of Your Feelings

Emotionally intelligent people know themselves well and move through life with clarity and confidence. They are aware of their emotions and how these influence their actions and the people around them. They also understand their strengths and weaknesses and actively work on them to improve. This self-awareness allows them to make thoughtful decisions rather than letting emotions dictate their actions. 

2. Staying in Control

People with high EQ don't let their emotions spiral out of control. They pause and think before acting, avoiding emotional and impulsive decisions. They can regulate their emotions, choose how they react to situations, and remain calm under pressure. They don’t allow their feelings or the influence of others to overwhelm them.

3. Self-Motivation

People with a high degree of emotional intelligence are motivated, productive, and driven by a sense of purpose. They see difficulties as opportunities for growth, have a clear understanding of what motivates them, and stay optimistic even in tough times. They avoid negative influences and surround themselves with like-minded individuals who inspire and push them to be better. They’re willing to challenge themselves, step outside their comfort zone, and ask for help when needed.

4. Empathizing with Others

Empathy is the ability to genuinely understand and share the feelings of others. Emotionally intelligent people listen carefully, consider different perspectives, and relate well to others. Empathy is vital for strengthening relationships and building trust. Being empathetic means recognizing others' feelings, acknowledging what they’re saying, and knowing how to make others feel valued and understood. The ability to empathize is a priceless gift and a prerequisite for helping others grow.

5. Being Open-Minded

Emotionally intelligent people are open to new ideas and differing opinions. They value diverse perspectives, are eager to learn, and are willing to challenge their own views. Open-mindedness fosters adaptability, creativity, and growth. It allows you to approach tasks and disagreements with a solution-focused mindset. When you’re open-minded, you’re approachable, and others feel comfortable sharing their thoughts with you.

6. Socially Comfortable

Another sign of high emotional intelligence is having strong social skills. Socially skilled individuals know what to say and how to say it. They excel at networking, reading social cues, and influencing others’ emotions. People with good social skills are easy to talk to, relatable, and great at managing disagreements. Their ability to perceive and understand emotions allows them to navigate social situations with ease and build strong connections.

7. Resolving Conflicts Constructively

Emotionally intelligent individuals resolve conflicts diplomatically. They practice empathy, listen to all perspectives, and focus on creating win-win outcomes. They stay calm, avoid assigning blame, and handle disagreements with tact. Effective conflict resolution prevents unnecessary tension and strengthens relationships rather than tearing them apart.

8. Taking Accountability

Those with high EQ take responsibility for their feelings and actions. They own their behaviors and acknowledge how they’ve affected others without pointing fingers or making excuses. Taking accountability earns respect, builds trust, and shows integrity, which makes others more likely to forgive and collaborate with you. 

9. Accepting Feedback 

Embracing feedback is a powerful tool for self-improvement. People with high EQ practice humility and seek feedback from trusted individuals to learn and grow. They handle criticism constructively, using it to improve rather than becoming defensive or offended.

10. Having Strong Relationships

Relationships are the foundation of a fulfilling and successful life. Emotionally intelligent people know how to build and maintain meaningful relationships based on trust, respect, and understanding. They invest time in nurturing their connections and supporting those around them. Strong relationships mean having a network of people who uplift, inspire, and motivate you. Your friends and family are critical contributors to your well-being. Positive relationships bring greater life satisfaction and help lower stress.

11. Sensing Non-Verbal Cues

Emotionally intelligent people are skilled at picking up on non-verbal communication like facial expressions, body language, and tone of voice. For example, they might spot displeasure in a colleague’s facial expression and address it before it becomes an issue. Non-verbal cues often reveal unspoken emotions, and recognizing them helps you respond empathetically and appropriately.

12. Practicing Gratitudef

Emotionally intelligent people take time to celebrate the positives in life. They understand how negative experiences can drain energy and focus on the good instead. Gratitude fosters a positive outlook, reduces stress, and improves relationships. It shifts your mindset from scarcity to abundance. 

How to Become Emotionally Intelligent?

Emotional intelligence is not a pre-determined trait, it is something that can be learned and developed at any point in life.

Here are some actionable tips to help you build your EQ starting today:

• Pause Before Reacting: When negative emotions arise, take a moment to reflect before responding.
• Practice Mindfulness: Stay present and observe your thoughts and emotions. Techniques like deep breathing can help.
• Seek Feedback: Ask people you trust for their insights into how you come across, and use their perspectives for self-improvement.
• Journal Regularly: Spend a few minutes every day writing down your thoughts and feelings to identify patterns and triggers.
• Focus on Empathy: Make it a habit to actively listen and consider others’ perspectives.
• Strengthen Communication: Practice clear and open communication while being mindful of your tone and body language.
• Develop Conflict Resolution Skills: Approach disagreements calmly. Avoid pointing fingers and blaming others. 

Actively implementing these practices will help you significantly boost your emotional intelligence. Changing habits is uncomfortable at first, but with each step you take, you’re molding who you are as a person. As you persist, it becomes easier and easier until it eventually turns into an automatic habit that will stay with you for years.

Neuroplasticity, the brain’s ability to rewire itself based on repeated experiences, plays a crucial role here. With consistent practice, your brain begins to reshape itself, creating new neural pathways that support emotional intelligence. Over time, traits like self-awareness and empathy become second nature.

For more ways to increase your EQ, check out our page on 50 tips for improving your emotional intelligence.

A Better Society Through Emotional Intelligence

The benefits of emotional intelligence extend far beyond personal growth. Imagine a society where parents raise children with empathy and understanding, where friends and loved ones treat each other with compassion, and where strangers show kindness in every interaction. The more emotionally intelligent individuals we have, the better the world becomes for everyone.

Each step you take toward emotional intelligence contributes to a more connected, supportive, and harmonious society.

Ready to Level Up Your EQ?

People with high emotional intelligence tend to find more success in life. 

They stand out for their ability to harness emotions to effectively solve problems and approach tasks in their everyday lives. By adopting these 12 traits you’ll be able to build stronger relationships, communicate more effectively, and unlock your full potential.

If you’re ready to change the way you approach work and life, RocheMartin is here to help.